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West What Abbey?

Note to all those reporters who keep calling it Westminister Abbey.
For crying out loud. It’s been around more than 1,000 years old.
Get the name right.
Westminster.
thank you.

Barely credible

Now magazine can pretend to be edgy and avant garde in photoshopping Toronto Mayor Rob Ford’s picture onto a fat, naked body.

if the Sun lampooned some chubby lefty in the same way, we’d be hounded out of town.

Not only is it disgraceful to make fun of a person over their weight, it is really bad journalism. If that’s all Now can come up with to criticize Ford, they should be ashamed of themselves. they must be running on empty.

It looked more like a highschool magazine than the mainstream newspaper they claim to be.

Royally confused

Oh, here we go. Let’s turn Stephen Harper’s invitation to the Royal Wedding into a political football.

They’re doing that in the U.S., where folk are upset that the Obamas haven’t been invited. So, let’s get this straight. Prince William is not the heir apparent to the Throne. His dad is. So it’s more a celebrity wedding than it is a state affair. If Will and Kate don’t want the Obamas, no need to invite them.

Noblesse oblige and all that.

As for Harper, he should go and have fun. And before all those folk who carefully parse every sneeze and every fart at such events have a hissy fit. Here’s how it works: Harper is not the head of state. Governor General David Johnston is – when the Queen’s not around. So Harper will not enter Westminster Abbey by the great entrance. And he will be seated with the prime ministers from other Commonwealth countries. And it will not be a snub.
Got that? Not a snub.

Spring forward? No thanks

Why do we do this/

Why do we put ourselves through this upheaval of putting our clocks forward one hour in the spring and one hour back in the fall?

First introduced as a wartime measure to save energy and allow factories to work for less money, this has outlived its usefulness.

Now its reported that there are 17% more accidents on the Monday after we implement Daylight Saving Time. Is anyone surprised? We’re all dazed and confused.

Stop messing with time. Leave it alone and we’ll all be happier.

Say a little prayer

What I find most annoying any time a tragedy of massive proportion happens is all the empty condolences.

Everyone’s on Twitter saying their “thoughts and prayers” are with the Japanese people at this time. Thoughts and prayers is the current meaningless catchphrase. It is meaningless because usually the people who say that are people you’re pretty sure haven’t said a prayer since their Grade 12 math exam. Worse, it’s usually said by people who, at any other time, would be mocking people who do actually pray on a regular basis.

So please, if you don’t pray, don’t tell victims of tragedy that you are keeping them in your prayers.

Locating my GPS

You know, I can almost understand the mentality of someone who would steal a GPS from someone’s car.
I accidentally left my car unlocked overnight recently and someone stole it.
Creeps are born every minute and stealing something someone had to work to buy is so much easier than actually getting a job and buying that thing for yourself.
So, given that crooks are crooks and probably can’t help stealing stuff, I have only one more thing to wonder about.
Who on earth buys from that creep a GPS that is obviously stolen? Can there really be that many people in this world who are so disgustingly hard up that they would provide a market for stolen goods? You’d like to say something like, “Honestly, get a life.” But these people don’t know the meaning of the word honestly, so what’s the point.
Can anyone recommend a good new GPS for me to buy – legitimately, from Best Buy or somewhere where they actually give you a receipt?

I Dreamed A Dream of Larry King

How odd that no one in the U.S. or Canada had even heard of Piers Morgan before that stunning Susan Boyle performance on Britain’s Got Talent.
Morgan started out supercilious and sneering towards Boyle. Then he was forced to become apologetic and humble.
Now he’s taking over from Larry King. I think he owes his job to a middle aged woman with awkward mannerisms and a fabulous voice.

Bommer angst

I am so tired ofthis attack on Baby Boomers.

Conventional wisdom is that we are going to suck the life out of health and pension services. This is nonsense.

We are the ones who have been paying for all these services. It is only because the largest demographic ever have been paying taxes and contributing to the economy for the last 40 years that the government has been able to provide the vast levels of service they’ve provided.

Now, after 40 years of living off the avails of boomers, they are telling us those services aren’t available to us? Get lost, I say.

Ticket to ride

Be warned!
Driving the Massachusetts Turnpike or New York State Thruway with out-of-state plates is a recipe for a speeding ticket.
We counted no fewer than 14 speed traps on the two highways recently. The number of people we’ve heard from who’ve been ticketed for doing no more than the speed of traffic. You’d cause an accident if you went any slower. All the cops have to do, though, is pick a car, any car, and you’re landed with a $150 ticket.

Cape Cod

There is no place I’d rather be on a hot August day than at the Cape.

The tide goes out for a mile here in Brewster. The sand flats reveal a cornucopia of marine life. Jellyfish, the odd sand shark, hermit crabs and horshoe crabs all wash up here. Even the odd Canadian journalist can be found wandering the gorgeous white sands.

You let the world wash over you and you can forget all those day to day problems that give you worry lines the rest of the year. Bliss!